TriJoni

2009-06-19T18:49:00.000-07:00

LUSH! LUSH! LUSH!

No other way to describe how beautiful Boulder is right now... best told posting pictures of the hike Jess and I did this afternoon around 5pm... Good climb up, at one point we realized we were really pushing hard and slowed the pace down a little so we could appreciate the beauty around us a little more :-)

Just so beautiful!!

Carter & I

Another gorgeous view looking South

Jess & Carter at the top

My best attempt to get us with beautiful background :-)

UFC 99 - Vacation Wrap Up

2009-06-18T09:46:00.000-07:00

Where to begin?

Last Tuesday (09JUN) was the travel day, with a morning arrival in Amsterdam on Wednesday (10JUN)

Must start by saying Lindsey is awesome, she came over Monday night and helped me come up with fun trendy outfits to take with me, that would have me fitting right in with those Europians :-) it was really fun to actually go thru my closet and find new ways to wear some of my stuff for when I get back, I have been pre-warned by Lindsey that I better not show up for an outing with her again wearing jeans and a tshirt, now that she knows what hangs in my closet, ha ha

Day One - Amsterdam - We made our way to our hotel, luckily Nicole had been there many times before so she navigated us thru the city and we made it to our quaint hotel. Rested a bit, showered, then went out in search of dinner and beer. Not a big drinker by any means, but all that traveling made me crave a beer, I think it has been about 15yrs since I have craved a beer :-)

We were walking along in the rain and I said out loud "I was just picturing us eating in a hole in the wall" and I am not kidding you, about 20sec later we look up and there was a pub called "Hole in the Wall" so we took it as a sign and enjoyed a yummy dinner and some Old Speckled Hen beers.

From there we set out for another walk, which landed us in a dance type bar, where I made my way to the stage with a pole and earned myself an american dollar, just like the good ol' days, ha ha... we had a blast then called it a night.

Day Two - Started day in Amsterdam, walked around looked into shops etc. then did the tourist thing and went to Anne Franks house, which was really really amazing. Wild to be so close to history like that, makes you speechless from time to time. After our day out and about, we got our luggage and headed to catch our train to Cologne. We got there 6min before our train took off so we definitely got our workout in that day sprinting thru the train station :-)

Train ride went to Cologne via Brussels, beautiful country side, and we watched a movie on the computer, so it made the 4hrs go by quickly. I started to get more and more nervous on the train as we made our way to Cologne, knowing I would see Marcus soon, and remembering that we were going there to watch him fight against Dan Hardy.

Into Cologne safely we made our way to our hotel and then had a nice casual dinner, with more excitement building up, knowing we were getting closer to seeing Marcus.

Day Three - we got a good workout in in the morning then we did a little shopping before getting ready for the weigh-in. When we got to the weigh-in we had no idea what to expect, nor how to get in touch with Marcus. So Nicole did some smooth talking and got one of the security guards to ecort us behind the scenes so we could maybe find out how to get our tickets, the lasts thing I wanted was to distract Marcus from prepping and all that jazz going on back there, but he turned our way, I waved and within moments he was running over and gave me a great big hug. It was so good to see him after 6 months!!

We chatted until weigh-in time, then went and watched the weigh-in. When the weigh-in was complete we said our goodbyes and said that we would touch base with him that night or Saturday morning. I opted for Saturday morning, as I didn't want to interrupt his routine or anything, I know how I feel before an Ironman, so can only imagine what he was feeling before something much bigger...

We had a great local dinner that night and met some friendly German men who helped us with the menu, and made sure we tried the local brewed Cologne beer. Had a beautiful stroll thru the City that night, and met Rich Franklin and wished him luck. He was very down to earth and have to admit, even cuter in person :-)

Day Four - Saturday 13JUN09 - Fight Night

We got in another good workout, Nicole headed to the gym and I headed out on the streets of Cologne for a nice run. Ran along the Rhein and thru the City streets, I really love to run in new places, it gives you a whole different perspective of the trip and a special memory. I did it during my trip to Italy and again when I drove across the country with Rob, and will continue to do it for future travels to come.

We called Marcus in the morning and he was resting, we decided that if he were to leave the hotel he would leave the tickets at the front desk, but luckily when we got to the hotel, he was still chilling in his room. He gave us our tickets, and we hung out for a little bit, got another picture with Marcus, and we headed back into City for lunch/touring/shopping.

Then it was fight time, we got ready and headed over to the arena... I can't put into words how nervous I was, I have a hard time watching him on the tele, so had no idea what it would be like to watch it live. I became quiet for some time, and made friends with Mark's Polish friends sitting next to us.

Watching a UFC event live was pretty intense, I'm glad I was there to experience this part of Marcus's life again. The last time I saw him live was when he was still boxing and it was at the Roxy in Boston. I am so proud of him, so proud of the man he has grown into and am grateful for all the memories that I have with him and for him. It sucked to see him with a loss and left me wondering if I should bother him after the fight.

We had agreed earlier that we would meet him back at the hotel, but I think we all just assumed this was going to be a win, it never even crossed my mind that there was any other outcome possible, guess that is just a sign of the strength of my belief in him :-) Nicole and I went back to our hotel and changed, then walked over.

I was having lots of mixed feelings, trying to think of how he would be feeling, if he would rather just be alone or just get a phone call to say goodbye. But luckily, I was able to see him and tell him I was proud of him. Doubt it changed how he was feeling much, but I do believe he trusts me and our friendship, so hopefully he could sense some of the pride and love!

I hope I get to see another fight, especially if they get to fight in Boston this year!!

Proud of you as always MPD and I will forever be on your side!

Day Five - Last Full Day - off to Frankfurt Germany

In as few words as possible, our last day was an adventure to remember, but will leave that to Nicole and I. It was full of driving with foreign signs, a 3hr search for a calling card in a City that is closed down on Sunday's, and ended with a fantastic meal and some red wine for me and white wine for Nicole during a thunder storm :-)

And just like that it was time to head back. Flights all went smoothly and got back on time, Jason was a saint and picked me up from the airport. Then I got to see Carter Marshall who was more than excited to see me!!

It's good to be home, but always a downer to finish a vacation, especially one that included seeing Marcus, someone who is very very special to me!!

Here are a few pics from the trip:

The Dom - Cologne Germany

Nicole Enjoying an American Breakfast in Cologne

Cologne

Cologne

Side Street in Amsterdam

2009-05-01T19:46:00.000-07:00

Wondering how many times I will promise myself to continue with blogging :-) I just really don't have a good idea how to float thru blogging, so one post can take me a long time to insert pics and move them to where they belong in the post... time for a "Blogging for Dummies" book I think!

I wanted to blog about our marathon journey a couple of weeks ago, but here it is nearly 2 weeks later and I am faced with a summary account of the weekend.

Due to a pending storm hitting Denver, and warnings of delays and cancellations, Allison & I agreed it was best to fly out early... that ended up being such a great decision, I got to spend a beautiful day with Katie & Allison. Katie was her usual charming self... here she is giving both Laura then Ryan a nice back massage:

After some fun in the sun on a beautiful Boston Spring Day, Allison and I headed to the Expo and got our numbers and met up with Tania:

The rest of the weekend was filled with lots of hydrating, spending time with Allison, Katie and friends. Sunday John gave us a nice good luck gathering at his studio in Winthrop. A good amount of Eddie's family and Allison's family came out to show their support for us as did some of our friends. It was a sure reminder of what our mission was the next day! Allison came up with a wonderful idea of how to show our thanks to our fundraising supporters by using our Dana-Farber banners! After that gathering, Allison & I headed into Boston to join a good number of the other 562 Dana-Farber runners at a pasta party. It was emotional and inspiring and it was nice to spend some alone time with Allison. Here are a few pictures to capture Sunday:

Having some technical difficulties so going to post this for now, so that the entire time it has taken me to do this small bit isn't for nothing :-) More later....

Marathon Time

2009-04-19T16:03:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow will be my 15th stand alone marathon, 18th time covering the distance and my 6th Boston... But it will be my first time running the entire distance step by step with friends and for a charity that has sadly impacted the lives of people that I love very very much!!!

Every marathon always feels like the first one way or another, and you never quite know what to expect, or what the day will bring, but this one is so special and close to my heart!

I will be documenting the journey with my camera and plan to have a great blog afterwards!!

STAY TUNED

Cheers to Someone I Love to Pieces...

2009-01-19T19:55:00.000-08:00

This weekend I was reminded of what it means to have a dream and to continue to strive towards it no matter what it takes or how long.

Marcus has been pushing himself for years to reach a level higher each time he steps into the octagon (formerly ring), and continues to find the next hardest fight/challenge and takes his fitness to the next level (which if you know how fit Marcus is, seems impossible to do...)

He has an incredible means for discipline, all the way from his routine, eating habits and most importantly the daily sacrafices he makes to get there. I wish I had an ounce of his discipline.

He has renewed my spirit at a time when I have let a current work situation take away something very important to me, and that I have allowed to be an excuse for the past few months, as always Marcus finds a way to impact my life positively, without even knowing... well okay I make sure I tell him!!

I love you to pieces MPD!!

I often get so wrapped up in my own sport that I forget to look oustide of it for role models and for people to look up to or to use as inspiration. Luckily, I have someone like Marcus in my life that reminds me every 3 or 4 months that anything is possible!!

Now just hoping that Natalie and I can carry that with us into our challenge in 2009 to complete the Triple Bypass Bike Ride... I'll have to make sure the UFC schedules Marcus for another fight this spring, ha! ha!

New Motivation Ideas

2009-01-05T21:27:00.000-08:00

So with every new year, you read articles about how to stick to a new plan, or you see postings at the gym enticing old and new members to join the latest trend that will ensure they stick to their workout resolutions this year...

Well this year I am trying to come up with my own....

1. The more time I spend trying to understand what Marcus does to prepare for his fights, the more it makes me want to become a UFC Fighter myself... okay, kidding, but the discipline it takes to be in that type of shape is inspiring... so Motivation Idea #1 is to take a boxing/kickboxing class again after many many years being away that type of workout... Does anyone remember Boxer Joey DeGrandis from Boston? I took a class with him at the Boston Athletic Club for about 9 months and I was in sick shape then... I LOVED that stuff!!!

2&3. As I wrap up this project and am quickly reminded of two more Motivational Ideas #2 & #3 - The 4mo of gym fees gone to waste and the exercise Carter has been robbed of. When I get back to Boulder in a month, my gym will be happy to see me every day again and Carter will be happy to be reaquainted with his leash.

4. Last but not least, my favorite number 4, so this has to be a good one... Motivation Idea #4 is travel, this seems like a good year to visit friends I haven't seen in a while and find races near them to have motivation to keep in shape and see special friends at the same time... Running and Triathlons have always given me a reason to continue my jet setting, so now I'm pairing it up with dear friends.... perfect mixture!!

Would love to hear what your Motivation Ideas are for 2009!!

Cheers

Joni

3yr Hiatus Comes to an End - Time to Blog

2009-01-04T16:48:00.000-08:00

Well with friends getting into being clever bloggers, I remembered that I had this blog out there and since it is the start of a new year and some new challenges, I thought this would be a great time to start back up!

I have officially withdrawn from Ironman Canada, I signed up knowing I had a couple of months to make up my mind, and with the project that I have been assigned to for the past few months and the diminishing time available to workout, I realized that I would be starting from scratch training again, rather than building on Ironman Wisconsin as I had hoped to. As much as it tugged at my heart to withdraw, I knew that it was the right thing to do for me right now.

The project will hopefully be wrapping up the end of January and I can get back into the swing of things. I am not a happy camper when I am not working out, and to add to that sitting in my car at a freezing cold job site for about 10hrs a day, this chiquita gets cranky... I guess that makes it a good thing I'm not around my friends during the week, ha ha!!

Regardless, I am excited for the new year, I am excited for the new challenges that I have decided to take on! And more importantly the challenges that some of my closest friends have opted in for... First Marathons, First Triathlons, soooo Exciting!!!

Personally, the first challenge is the Boston Marathon in April.

As most of you know Allison & I have been given the opportunity to give back to Dana Farber in memory of Eddie and to help bring awareness to and raise funds for the Fight against Cancer.
To date I am happy to announce that we are more than 2/3 to our fundraising goal, with our training just starting we will focus on completing the final fundraising efforts and hopefully shoot right past our goal set of $3000ea for a Grand Total of $6000.

For donations go to www.rundfmc.org/jonif2009

I am also starting the year with a nasty cold, but as I start to feel a little better today, it makes me feel brand new and craving that great feeling of being out in the fresh crisp air for a nice run. Hopefully I can keep that loving feeling as I get 100%

I am guessing that hanging out with Amy this weekend in Florida will spark that last bit of energy I need to get back on track. She always has such a positive impact on my mental health and my passion for being fit!! If I want her to continue to use me as a reference for www.bodiesbybadger.com I better fit the part :-)

Cheers and I look forward to getting back up to speed... I won't try to bore you with all that has happened the past 3yrs since my last blog... since you all know anyways...

Joni

Team Hoyt

2006-05-30T09:45:00.000-07:00

Sunday was the 14th annual Team Hoyt 5k www.teamhoyt.com, a race that I have been looking forward to since last year.

With the temperature climbing into the 80s for an 11:30am start time, it was nice to run into teammates Dawn & Krista (each with their spouses as well).

This race is so GREAT!!! Everyone goes home with a prize and Dick & Rick are gracious enough to stand for pictures with all the Age Group winners. I think the girls would agree with me, when Rick's relative won a trophy in his age group, his excited reaction was enough to cover your body with goose bumps! Of course his big smiles when a cute girl would go up was a special sight to see too :-)

My original goal for this race was for it to be my time to break that 21 min barrier. However, with the knee still keeping me from MANY workouts, I opted to just go out and do my best and try for a top AG finish. My first mile was 6:21, at which point I knew I was very likely going to crash and burn (I need to take my own advice about pacing), but I kept moving one foot in front of the other, the easiest way to get to any finish line!!

Holding strong 'til the last 1/2 mile, flash gordon teammate Krista pulls up beside me and checks on my knee and how i'm feeling... being her track coach I told her to get a move on and go for a top 3 female finish(NO PRESSURE). It is great to see teammates that have been working hard at track and hills excel and reach new limits!! The heat made my head feel like it was going to pop off, I sure do love racing in the winter months... someday I will figure out a good cooling system for my body.

I am very satisfied and happy with my finish, and have no complaints of a 22:43 finish (good for a 1st AG prize). It wasn't my dream goal of sub 21:00 but I am very excited b/c that means I have something to continue to strive for this year... although after Sunday, I'm thinking that I may have a sub 20 in me someday :-)

Krista had a fabulous 3rd Female Overall finish and 1st in AG. Dawn strided in for a 2nd place AG finish! WAY TO GO GIRLS (oh and did I mention Dawn got a case of beer and Krista a George Foreman Grille!! SWEET)

Snap Crackle Pop

2006-05-25T06:22:00.000-07:00

I can't think of a better way to start a day than heading to Dr. Melman's (http://melmanchirogroup.com/)

My appointment was at 7:30am, his first patient of the day! We caught up on how things are going and he is excited to hear of my new adventures about to take place, and even better has a recommendation for someone I can go to out West!!

He could feel every ounce of tension in my neck and worked to release this nagging headache I have had for a few days. Always my first sign that it has been FAR too long since I have been in for an adjustment!! Dr. Melman is amazing, he is completely invested in each of his patients and I will plan to see him as many times as I can squeeze in before I head out.

My favorite part of leaving his office before Boylston Street is too full of rush hour traffic/crowds is the bare look at the Boston Marathon Finish Line. It brings me into a wonderful space and fills my head with my own memories of crossing as well as the memories of friends and those who I don't know, but understand have their own personal reasons for running 26.2 miles. It gives me a sense of peace and permits me to face the day with a better outlook and puts things into perspective.

I love Boston but today it was symbolic to think about Finish lines and what they mean to me. Once you cross a finish line, it does not mean that something is over, it means you are on your way to recovery and celebration and a new chapter. Seems fitting to me right now!!

2006-05-16T06:58:00.000-07:00

This morning Beth and I met for Run Hills and our troops opted to stay out of the rain. I think the rain is really breaking some training spirits in Massachusetts... Despite Beth's sunburn, and my flu bug we headed out for a leisurely run around Watertown.

Mid-way thru the run, my stomach could not take it any longer so we had to make a quick stop and then continue one. Thankfully, Bethie is very patient with me these days, and stuck back with my sluggish pace as I pushed thru the stomach discomfort of my flu bug. Ok, so maybe I shouldn't have been running, but unlike some, I LOVE to run in the rain.

Today was no exception. I can't comprehend what my fellow Massachusetts folks are enduring with the flooding, it is sad and frustrating b/c I don't know how to help. A run like today clears my mind and reminds me of what I should be focusing on and to take today as an opportunity. I know that I have far too many possessions and I want to continue to lessen my "material" load and focus on giving to those who are far more in need.

I also took a moment to grab one branch of a lilac. My favorite flower by far and the rain is destroying them for a second season in a row... So I need to make sure that I grab as many as I can to enjoy the smell before they all fall to the ground! I keep driving by them thinking, "I should stop and grab some" No more!!! I will stop and I will enjoy as many lilacs as possible!!! No need to miss out on something that makes me so happy right :-)

Hurry to Hiatus to Hump to Huh??

2006-05-09T10:24:00.000-07:00

After a long needed vacation, I am finally ready to settle back into things and get myself on a training schedule. (Thanks to Beth for reminding me it is only now 11 weeks 'til IMLP)

Hurry
I had been anticipating this vacation for months & months, kept wishing it would hurry up and get here, but now looking back the week flew by and the wedding and meeting Nico for the first time seems a lifetime ago... I tried to savor each moment, but alas the week went by too quickly

Hiatus
For nearly 8 weeks leading up to vacation, I had finally gained some ground on my bad eating habits, then vacation hit and I went on hiatus. I tried to make the best choices I could with my schedule being so crazy, but the "bad eater" Joni inside of me kept saying "you're on vacation!" so needless to say my hiatus has turned into a bit of an upward battle and I will need to really reach inside to my will-power to win over old Joni to get back on track

Hump
With the Boston Marathon behind me, I thought my focus would be a smooth transition to IMLP, but I have found myself at a hump. I mean I should be on top of my game, I just ran a qualifying time on the home court what more could a girl ask for? This certainly is a goal I never set for myself b/c it was something that seemed so off the map (especially with my knee acting the way it does now) but vacation came and I ran a couple of times, but the knee was sore again. I then got back from vaca and have been fighting a cold/allergies since. Which made for a shortened training weekend. I am happy to say I climed the Kanc with Beth & Tania, but rather than a 75mi ride, I cut it short to 60mi.

Huh?
This is where I am at today!

Huh? Where did all that time go for training? How is it that I only have x amount of long rides left to do. How will I gain the cycling fitness in time to shave 47 minutes off my bike time from Canada (aggressive goal but that is part of what keeps us coming back for more)

Huh? Janus has called to tell me I have won a slot for any Continental North America IM this year.... can I do 2 IM's in one year?

Huh? why is my knee still aching? It has been 5 MONTHS already! I try really hard to focus back on the positive, but some days it does bug me, I have to be honest here!

Huh?

The GREAT news is that today I did a mid-week ride with Bethie. We had no expectations of our ride and set out to do Mill Rd/Trapelo. After we did some good climbs, we opted for a different route back and just enjoyed the morning. I feel so refreshed now. I feel like this was a big step towards tasting the IM again!! Now I just need to be responsible for myself and keep up the momentum!!

I have a lot of decisions to make over the next couple of weeks, so I am just hoping I can find the drive to continue with my fitness and remember how good I feel today for getting out on the bike and just enjoying a morning ride!!

GO TOE TOE

2006-03-27T08:28:00.000-08:00

This was my mantra yesterday!!

After spending the second half of Saturday and early yesterday morning with my nephew Kaelan, I am seeing things in such a new light!!

Kaelan has become very affectionate again, and he certainly worked his magic on his Aunie Toe Toe (yes there is no "T") this weekend. I got smothered in hugs and kisses, even had a slumber party with him Saturday night. Being with Kaelan and seeing life thru his eyes was the exact medicine this Toe Toe needed. I have been really stressed out at work the past few weeks and it is consuming me, but it all disappeared for a few hours this weekend and I enjoyed every moment with Kaelan.

He was holding on to me yesterday morning as I was packing to go, saying that he didn't want me to go, or that he was going to go with me. I could have held on to him forever, it made my heart feel so full, a feeling that I just can't really put into words!!! As I was getting ready to leave he said "WAIT" and went and got a piece of paper and pencil and wrote me a sign "GO TOE TOE" since he knew I was going to be attempting a 10mile run for the first time in months that morning. He blew me kisses and told me he loved me (oh and requested that I win the race and mail the trophy to him... ah children and their dreams...)

I then drove to Lisa's house in North Hampton, NH and met up with her and Robin. Lisa's son Keith drove us to the starting line of the Run to the Border 10 Miler... we had many game plans that day, at about mile 3 I could turn off to Lisa's house if my knee kicked in, or from there on I could catch a ride from any one of the several fans following their fellow runners...

Mile 5 went by and I checked in, so far so good, so I allowed myself to continue. It was so much fun to feel different muscles talking to me again, my running muscles were happy to have a conversation with me yesterday.

This run is so gorgeous, it follows along the North Coast, so with the sun shining and the waves crashing to shore, I watched the multiple surfers on their surfboards try and catch the Spring waves, I would briefly close my eyes and take a deep breath of sea air, and many times I reminded myself of the time spent with Kaelan and my specialized sign in my pocket, and my heart would fill up with joy again!!

As I neared the finish line, I took the sign out of my pocket and held it in my hand as I finished. I am thinking that this sign is going to see many races this season, just the reminder I need to be happy to be back out there and also remind myself to not always take life too seriously. Kids have a way of teaching adults things that they know deep down but simply choose to ignore.

To the "Young Master" Kaelan, thank you for being a cheerleader for Aunie Toe Toe, I love you with all my heart!!!!

Lucky 13

2006-03-14T05:51:00.000-08:00

Who says the number 13 is unlucky?

In high school I wore the #13 in softball. Well, only until my Sophomore year when the center-fielder and I ran into one another and I ended up lying on the ground and picked up by a nice ambulance crew who gently cut my shirt off, since they could not move me, afraid I had a severe neck injury.... Ok, so back then it may not have seemed so lucky

But today, today it is a very lucky number for me! Why? Because, today I ran for exactly 13 minutes!! The alarm went off at 5:45am and as I came out of my cold medicine induced fog, I heard the rain falling outside and asked myself if I should just stay in bed, but I knew that no rest could make me feel better than a run. On top of that, I LOVE to run in the rain!! With the mild temperature of 47 today, I dressed accordingly and headed out the door.

I feel like I'm doing a bike safety check, each step posing a question about my body alignment, my foot strike, my arm position, my head position, my breathing pattern. Then it occurred to me, this is my chance to mold my running form again. I can justify the slow come back, because now I can correct some of my bad running form habits, and strengthen my good habits.

As each minute ticked by, I found that peace inside me that I have missed so dearly the past 3.5 months. I ended knowing that my heart could run forever and as soon as my knee and lungs are 100% I know that they will also be ready to run forever.

All this in a mere lucky 13 minutes!!!

One Mile Down, Many More to Go

2006-03-07T13:13:00.000-08:00

One week after the cortisone shot and I am happy to report I ran a mile today! I laced up my new sneaks in hopes that I would have the courage to warm up with my fellow TE gals this morning at run hills. With Beth out of town I asked that we meet at the track rather than at the pool so that I could ensure the safety of the runners, just in case I couldn't run more than a few feet :-)

So at 6am we hit the track for a one mile warmup and I found myself afraid, I am so nervous about running again and taking a step backwards that I feel this will be a new area to build my confidence. Who wants to be afraid of running? I certainly don't!

I was anxious, nervous, excited, timid, many things that I don't usually think of when I think of running. But the warmup felt ok and so I ran one hill with the gals before I decided it was time to walk the rest and run down with them. I kept waiting for a tweak or a twinge, but I made it thru and didn't get in my car with any aches and now it is nearly the end of the work day and still no pain.

I will say, BOY do I have a LONG way to go aerobically though. I charged up the hill and certainly felt the 3 months of sedativeness reaching for air from my lungs. Luckily, my recovery is still quick, but it simply amazes me what it feels like to start from scratch yet again. I am into my 3rd round of PT and hopefully my last.

Despite the fear I now have in the back of my mind, I am also ready to take it slowly and build up so that I have another great year and if all goes well stay away from PT for a long time!!!

Ash Wednesday

2006-03-01T13:19:00.000-08:00

What does wearing my ashes mean to me?

Today is the second time I have received ashes as a new Catholic and as I still learn why things are what they are, I have allowed for some self reflection on what the Lent season means to me.

Today I put aside the stress and worries that I would be late to work. I drove over to my parish in Brookline, St. Mary's of the Assumption http://www.stmarybrookline.com/bulletin.htm for the 7:30am Mass. As always Fr. Jack was wonderful and the Gospel really hit home. It provided time to reflect on acts of kindness that each of us try to do and that we should be careful about "tooting" our own horns when doing so.

I know that I am a true and kind person at heart, but I also know that I am guilty from time to time for doing something for some form of recognition, even if for a simple thank you. We are brought up to say the please and thank you's, but not so much to provide a caring silent action that is something only for your inner self to enjoy.

This Lenten season I am chosing to add something and to subtract something. As I did last year, I am adding a daily reading to my day, preferably in the morning, but this year I am also adding a goal that as I do the little things, I want to check in with myself and ask why I am doing it and to make sure that I am not selfishly expecting anything in return for it.

As for subtracting, well it is time to take away the excessive treats again this year. Now that Ironman training is fast upon me, I want to get re-focused and zone in on the task at hand for July 23rd!!

Eventhough Lent is perceived, at times, to be a dark time at church, it is a time that reminds me of how lucky I am to be on this journey and to be grateful for all that I have in my life.

Knee(d) for More

2006-02-21T05:51:00.000-08:00

Today is Tuesday and as with every other Tuesday it was a day Beth & I lead the run hills workout. Funny thing about this workout though... I haven't participated since November. Granted I have tried a couple of times to muscle thru it, and at other times I have succumbed to my left knee and simply followed behind them in my CRV as their protector from early morning drivers.

I have not attempted to run for over a month, as my waist line continues to change and my body composition is close to that of a sedative person at this point, today I found it a struggle to keep the tears back. I was able to, mainly b/c I was with teammates, and seeing how hard they are pushing themselves at 6am in the morning is a great reward as a coach.

I would walk up the hill and meet them on their recovery coming down. These women are all amazing, even new comer Krista asked how I was doing, apparently just b/c I was holding back the tears didn't mask that I was frustrated. My reply continued to be "just need to push the bad energy out of my mind and let the good energy in"

The question is, how much longer will I have to keep this front? How much longer am I suppose to be ok with the fact that I miss my long runs, track workouts, time spent in the open air with my thoughts! I miss that rush of finishing a run.

I had my MRI on Sunday so on the 28th we will get the results. I think my biggest fear at this point is getting the response "we still don't know what is wrong" It is hard to focus your energy on the unknown, but I will dig deep and muster thru. #1 B/c I want to and #2 B/c I need to

I am calling on my faith right now and each day I try to read this line:
"Do not be afraid, Stand firm, and see the deliverance that the Lord will accomplish for you today" (Exodus 14:13)

So now that I am being honest, I am frustrated, angry and sad that it has been nearly 3.5 months since I could just run when I want to. But I was reminded today that it is ok that I feel those things, just as long as my determination, strength, committment and my ability to feel very proud of my teammates outweigh the icky stuff!!

Week of Goals

2006-01-27T22:15:00.000-08:00

I attended a seminar Monday evening, Januray 23rd that focused on Goal Setting. The seminar was brought to Boston by a company Lululemon http://www.lululemon.com. I first found this company when I was out visiting Lisah a couple of months ago.

Lululemon is coming to Boston soon, and with it they are bringing their philosophy of living life to the fullest and encouraging others to make positive changes to their lifestyles.

Little did I know that this 2 hour seminar was going to result in a week of self reflection and taking action to move certain areas of my life forward.

I am excited to take some time this weekend and collect my thoughts, consider my options and with the help of my faith and friends, put gears in motion that I have been sitting on for quite some time.

The seminar talked a lot about how our lives often fall into the following three areas: 1. addiction to distraction 2. dwelling on the past 3. Auto pilot mode.
I think the biggest factor for me is the addiction to distraction. Each morning a piercing alarm wakes me up, then I put the news on to check the weather, off to the bus/train I go which is anything but quiet, then I get to work and outside my window is the beeping of Boston angry horns, and the fire station is a block away, back to the train/bus to go home, then my evenings are filled with phone calls, classes, watching Ellen, listening to the radio, then at night I put the tv on snooze so the noise puts me to sleep. When in the day do I take some quiet time for reflection? When do I check in with myself to see how I am doing and if I am working towards the things in life that make me happy?

It was explained to me in terms that I know are common sense but hearing them from someone who was so passionate really lit a fire under my butt "You choose who you are being in the face of a situation (of what happens)."

Put me in my running shoes, or on my bike or in the water and I know who I choose to be, it is the times I am at work and faced with a situation with my boss, or when I have a conflict with a peer that I often times jump to a "defensive mode" rather than choosing to be generous in the situation or happy in the situation. My friend Kaili often times looks at her situations and allows herself to step back and look at them with reason and justification, before jumping to a conclusion.

So after rambling on for quite some time, I am not sure where this post is taking me, except to a place that will lead me to a better place. This weekend I am committing to finding my way and making a plan!!!

Thank you Fr. Jack for setting some time aside for me Sunday after Mass. I am looking forward to the guidance.

Time to Reflect

2006-01-23T05:15:00.000-08:00

After doing the Boston Prep 16 Miler yesterday and finishing the last 2 miles in more pain than necessary, I am finally ready to give in to my injury. After weeks of PT and building up my running slowly again, I had hoped that my knee was ready for the bigger mileage.

After Jim Memory (my massage therapist a.k.a "The Healer") sent me an email on Friday with his reflections on the recent discovery of the mass of scar tissue, I probably should have bowed out and either gone to cheer on my rockstar friend Beth (as she is continuing her major running breakthrough), and my other friends Tania & Pete who were experiencing this infamous hilly course for the first time... or even participated in the swim meet with my other TE ladies down in Weymouth. However, against better judgement I toed the line with the other runners on a sunny cold morning.

Beth & I were hoping for 9 minute miles, the first mile was a 9:30, which is of no surprise with the hill start and then of course just getting into the groove around the many bodies at the starting line. The next 3 miles we clocked under 8:30's and kept saying we had time in the bank. The rollers in this course in the beginning give you the opportunity to warm up for what lies ahead. And there is one mile that you feel as though you are being shot straight downhill, and all the while you must keep in the back of your mind that since we finish were we start, at some point we have to come back up that same distance :-)

My knee held strong until mile 7, so as Beth points out, this is GREAT news I am up to 7 miles of pain free running and had it been a 7 mile race, I would probably have walked away as I had arrived. We continued to push forward and picked up the pace again (as the faster I go the less the knee hurt and the sooner we would be done)

The hills started coming and this was bad news for the knee, but I put on my Iron cap and pushed up those hills, it was fun to pass so many runners as they walked up, Beth and I even heard one girl proclaim "I can't do it anymore, I need a break" This was said on the 1 mile climbe to the 11 mile marker!! At mile 11 I knew my time was running out, so I handed Beth the car keys and told her to go kick some butt, this girl was in her stride and just getting stronger!!

We managed to stay together for a couple more miles, at mile 14 we checked in with one another and she gave me the words of encouragement I needed to hear to put in my mind that I could finish if I just focused. I wished her well and told her she had over 30 minutes to finish the 2 miles and beat her time from last year (Beth's goal this year) and then settled into a pace I thought my knee could handle for the remaining 2 miles.

I have to tell you, that knowing how hard my friend Beth has worked and then to watch her run so fast and smooth, quick cadence, head steady, arms relaxed my throat welled up and I could have cried from happiness. I knew right then that my dear friend was closer to her Boston Qualifier than she knows!!

Finishing that race yesterday was painful, and yes I will most likely not be running for another month or so now, I take full responsibility for the pain that woke me up at 3:30am this morning, but I have the words to support why I made the decision to run this race. The fall last year changed things for me, and I'm still not sure what limitations will be set on me once all is said and done, but I know one thing for sure... I wanted that Boston Prep, I wanted to take back what was yanked from me last season and I wanted to run with my heart.

I make a pledge now to my knee, to my friends, to Jim and to my PT Lisa Griggs that I will follow their every word and be on the cautious side from now on. It won't be easy and I may need help along the way, but at least I know I did the Boston Prep in 2006.